In My Opinion...(Conclusion)

     I have thought long and hard about what I am going to comment on.  I have been given a very important task, commenting on an issue that effects our game. Are you ready for it.  I want you to read my words and contemplate what I have to share with you. The opinion I am about to express is directly related to the very foundation of our game. Here it is.  The golf ball is very important to our game. That's a pretty profound statement, isn't it?
     Without the ball, our game would be nothing. When the game first began over 500 years ago, it was little more than shepherds on the coast of Scotland would hit rocks around pastures with sticks and try to get that rock into a hole a distance away.  It was found that rocks were very inconsistent in their size and shape, as well as their tendency to break the favorite "goff sticks" of the shepherds. Not only that, they didn't roll well on the beautifully manicured greens.
     Something had to be done. Let's see, what do we do.  I know, let's take a small leather pouch and fill it with a top hat full of feathers then sew the pouch up and hit the crap--uh, feathers--out of it. That makes a lot of sense. I always wondered how they got all those feathers into that pouch. This was the introduction of the golf ball.
     The ball evolved from that leather sack of feathers. A rubber ball was introduced.  Knobs were added to the ball to give it a better flight. The ball's design changed and became a true ball that had a small liquid or solid center that was wrapped in rubber bands with a thin rubber outside cover with dimples to make it fly better. These balls had very good senses of humor and were very quick to detect bad swings. After about four holes the showed that sense of humor by smiling back at you. I think I still have a couple of those balls and they are still laughing at me.
     Then came the ultimate design, the solid ball. In my formative years of playing golf, I used to play solid balls and was laughed at. Now, that is the way the ball is designed. They can make a solid ball behave anyway designers want it to with their three, four, five, six, twenty-eight layers of different types of high technology polymers. I think I even saw a ball sing a Willie Nelson tune they are getting that technologically diverse.
      In my opinion, a ball has to be round, hard and have dimples.  The ball is a key part of our game. Now there, is that enough of an opinion for you.

All those balls that were laughing retired and took up skydiving.